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Paul Turner
Paul Turner

31 Followers

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Love and Liking

You love someone, but not like them much, and spend more time elsewhere. You can like your pals, but not feel the ache of love, and hold each other for fun. When you both like and love someone, there’s the bond that keeps — the strength and regard for the ages.

Love Language

1 min read

Love and liking
Love and liking
Love Language

1 min read


22 hours ago

From the Far Side of Medicare

“My plan offers a budget for cleaning supplies and $155 in food benefits.” The plan that I am recommending to you offers $255 in food benefits. “What cleaning supplies does it offer for my under-the-table business?” Feed yourself well, and buy in bulk.

Food Budgets

1 min read

From the Far Side of Medicare
From the Far Side of Medicare
Food Budgets

1 min read


1 day ago

From the Far Side of Medicare

My first caller had an email address that started with “sleepyass.” How was he talking? Dunno, he soon hung up and fell out.

Buttocks Routine

1 min read

From the Far Side of Medicare
From the Far Side of Medicare
Buttocks Routine

1 min read


3 days ago

From the Far Side of Medicare

In a strong voice she said, “I have A, B, C, and D.” In fact, she had 1/6 of the alphabet.

Medicare Part A

1 min read

From the Far Side of Medicare
From the Far Side of Medicare
Medicare Part A

1 min read


6 days ago

From the Far Side of Medicare

Maria, are you telling me you need hearing aids? “Yes.” Well, let’s see about helping you with that. CLLLLLIIIIICK I guess Maria didn’t hear me.

Hearing Loss

1 min read

From the Far Side of Medicare
From the Far Side of Medicare
Hearing Loss

1 min read


6 days ago

From the Far Side of Medicare

“Is this a scam?” Is that veal scampi? Are we scampering to start our evenings?

Far Side

1 min read

From the Far Side of Medicare
From the Far Side of Medicare
Far Side

1 min read


Sep 13

Stenosis

A stiff upper lip A back against the wall A leaking heart valve A crush or more of feeling No cushy cushion No floating on a confused back No online betting or people-watching upright No drinking ‘cept through a silky straw Laughing is not advisable; can’t exert Pursing lips…don’t watch this wreck

Stenosis

1 min read

Stenosis
Stenosis
Stenosis

1 min read


Sep 4

Ruining our health, let alone the planet

We’re vaping all day long and choking during alternate-day Zooms We’re inhaling nitrous oxide in Birmingham UK parks and falling out through neurological bottoms. How about playing Frisbee or badminton, or rolling in the grass. What we offer as palliatives at the end of days — freeing one from bone-crushing pain — Does not release psychic pain or boredom in less potent formulations. Life is pain and joy and else.

Palliative Care

1 min read

Ruining our health, let alone the planet
Ruining our health, let alone the planet
Palliative Care

1 min read


Sep 2

Settled Ministers and Star Searches

Searching for a settled minister is not a Star search that begins with small regional tryouts that bubble up eccentrics, oddities, and the sui generis. We can’t field hundreds of candidates and settle on a new minister ten years from now. (Charlotte North Carolina 2023)

Star Quality

1 min read

Settled Ministers and Star Searches
Settled Ministers and Star Searches
Star Quality

1 min read


Aug 25

From a cordoned-off beach with wife and guard

Dear secret diary: I am a noisy rattler, I throw my weight around I can taper entrance ramps to major bridge crossings I caress burnt-orange faces Reporters are rebuffed — I loved kicking their stuffing out But I would like forgiveness on few transgressions And a wide bedroom suite in the White House Ex-Governor of New Jersey (and garden-variety bullies)

Governor Chris Christie

1 min read

From a cordoned-off beach with wife and guard
From a cordoned-off beach with wife and guard
Governor Chris Christie

1 min read

Paul Turner

Paul Turner

31 Followers

Voiceover actor, writer, singer, and poet.

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